The Movement: "Rebellion & Dismissive Judgment"
Written by Andi Bazaar, Seth Gryffenberg MD and “introducing” Christopher Kofflér | Jan 5, 2024
There is a lot of hurt in the LGBTQIA+ Community, my heart hurt seeing so many statements about stigma around HIV/AIDS. "HIV mistruths have no place in our society, HIV is not a gay disease." — Christopher Kofflér
I hate racist and homophobic people like we live in a world full of diversity, we must accept ourselves and people around us.
I hate it when people justify racist/sexist/homophobic/etc statements with "thats just my opinion." — I'm all for supporting political and social diversity, but if your opinion requires you to put someone down purely based on something they have no control over then my opinion is that you're just looking for a way to be a bigot and your opinions are worthless.
It is okay not to have an opinion about homosexuality, it's okay not to support LGBTQIA+ Community and it's okay to just be indifferent and quiet.
I really don't have time to be arguing that complicity in the face of homophobia is pretty much the same thing as being passively homophobic.
Ever happen to you someone making jokes about homosexuality or gay's you want to stop want to tell them it's totally normal it's not a abuse but you stop yourself because they will make fun of your sexuality If you are straight or something else?
Because this society doesn't know how to respect others sexuality don't know it's depends on people if they wanted to open and every tomboyish girl or every other guy who support LGBTQIA+ Community isn't gay or lesbian themself they don't understand it's not okay to make fun of.
- It’s perfectly okay that your religion doesn’t support LGBTQIA+ but when that becomes a hatred and inequality towards a person who defines as LGBTQIA+ its not religion at this point it’s homophobia. Wip! "Rebirth"
- I'd really appreciate it if y'all could spread this around, and if you identify with something not present please let me know also if you have a problem with anything represented here and you don't respect the LGBTQIA+ Community. You can kindly fuck off!
The LGBTQIA+ Community is amazing and deserves a lot of respect, I know gender can be fluid and I respect the people from the LGBTQIA+ Community but please understand this approach will not net us any progress on the fight to make the world more tolerant. We can find a solution later after we study every option, but we have to do it right.
You don't have to be part of the LGBTQIA+ community or be "this" involved, you just always have to ask yourself a question before remarking others, "Is the way I'm acting how I would want to be treated as a person?" — Simple but makes a great change in someone's perspective.
The older I get the more I realize I never really liked or truly loved anyone, I think that my pride just wouldn’t let me “lose” or feel like I lost. Love takes a lot of effort, effort I was never willing to put in. It’s crazy how maturity can really change your perspective.
I gotta say this, if someone tells you they were hurt by something you said or did, then it hurts. Your perspective of it being hurtful or not doesn’t matter cuz it won’t change how they feel, stop being so insensitive, drop the pride, apologize and be considerate of people's feelings.
"It's quite liberating, how an object of shame can bring about pride with just a slight change in perspective."
I love seeing men talk about how their woman exposed them to new things, perspectives and to be a better being. Y’all don’t know that there’s a lot of pride in some men and when they are open about how a woman changes their lives, it’s another level of love and humblness.
Ironic how you’ll judge someone at some point in your life for their choices and then you end up in the same position, a lil change in your perspective really humbled you and teaches you a lesson if you are willing to being introspective and not let your pride disable your growth.
"No matter how many times I recalculate, change perspectives or reevaluate what happened the best closure I got was no closure. Pride takes people down a long road."
If we’re keeping it buck, “stop expecting you from other people” doesn’t get spoken about loudly enough. A lot of the time we waste energy trying to figure out other people’s why?
- why people are not like us?
- why people don’t think like us?
- why people don’t rationalise like us?
- why people don’t do things the way we do things?
Its funny because we assume the epicentre of “normal” is us (our individual selves) and anyone who doesn’t fit into our definition of “the norm” is wrong but truth be told under what grounds do you have that everyone should be exactly like you. Tell me?
You don’t have to always see it as “I'm better than you (pride) instead constantly meditate on seeing it as “I’m just different to or from you” and see how powerful such a shift in your mind-set can change your perspective on things.
From the stage of awareness it might move into a state of denial from parents perspective. We as LGBTQIA+ individuals might be "mourning" of not being heterosexuals?
Most of the coverage of this has been from the perspective of LGBTQIA+ prospective parents, but imagine the horror of being queer or trans kid being placed by a (taxpayer funded) agency that will only place with anti-LGBT parents and in a state that allows "conversion therapy"
Back in August 2018, I saw a news on TV about 9 year old boy killed himself after being bullied just days after coming out.
This is just depressing of course, LGBTQIA+ is aren't new to elementary students and I can understand the outcome once you come out, it’s just a shame that the teachers didn’t stop the bullying.
LGBTQIA+ people aren’t new to elementary students, who can have LGBTQIA+ family members, teachers, neighbors, etc. They actually have to be familiar with something to be intolerant of it, kids aren’t getting the help needed from the parents.
I don't agree with the whole orientation thing but having parents that hear their kids out and that they could talk to rather than jumping to more dramatic cocnclusion such as this.
You can’t disagree or agree with someone’s sexual orientation, it exists outside of your perspective and suicide is way more complex than simply talking to a parent — LGBTQIA+ youth are already at a higher risk for suicide, even when they’re not being bullied.
At his age he shouldn’t even know if he is straight, gay or bi. Just sad that kids have to go through that kind of thing at such a young age, our society is so messed up it’s ridiculous. If parents would teach their kids ethics our world would be a better place.
My heart aches for this broken world we live in, the fact that a 9 year old would be driven to this point is beyond heart-breaking. Education about acceptance of the LGBTQIA+ Community to youth is crucial for kids to be willing to accept themselves and their peers.
This is outrageous! Something has to be done to stop the bullies, parents have to be notified and stop this terrible behavior.
The thing with children is they aren’t born hateful, they are taught to be that way by adults who should know better. This little boy was taken from his family too soon in his young life because someone decided to raise their children to hate those who are different such a shame.
For those that are still suffering this day, it’s definitely going to be a reflective time for you. You’ll be feeling somewhat emotional and withdrawn because you yearn for love but it’s important to remember it’s all around you.
It could be one of the first times you’ve spent this holiday alone, or at least without a partner or other people you love around while this is a transition just remind yourself you’re not alone. Nurture your body and mind, don’t be afraid to reach out to others for support.
- You’re not being too needy in wanting to have support present, in desiring someone’s embrace through long days and nights but you also have to figure out what you truly want or need and enforce your boundaries as to keep your own individual identity also space in a relationship.
- Some of you could be spending time with a family member or a few, most of the day inside or home. You could also be getting together with friends and celebrating your own type of “anti-holi-day" like watching movies, eating snacks amd being each other’s comfort talking through bs.
If there’s work that needs done, cleaning, reorganizing or scheduling - it’s likely you’ll feel an extra burst of motivation to get this done as well. It would help your mental health greatly to clean up your space, move things around and get rid of what’s no longer needed.
It’s very possible that you have an eye-opening talk with someone or a realization in how to move forward w a certain connection/situation in your life but due to your pride may try to ignore this positive direction have an open mind instead and allow a change in perspective.
When I was growing up gay in the 80's - 90's, we all knew some families could be homophobic environments but I never remember the gay rights movement trying to turn lesbian and gay children against their parents. The focus was on encouraging dialogue, the focus was on taking time to listen to and understand one another.
Before one of my family member came out to my parents, he bought a book for parents about accepting their gay child. I remember he hiding it away, so it was ready to give to my parents. I remember he worrying about how that conversation might go.
But no one ever tried to persuade him to turn against my parents, no one ever encouraged him to view my family as an unsafe place. No one ever made him doubt that my parents loved him.
One of the aspects of the modern LGBTQIA+ Rights Movement that concerns me the most is the way it undermines the family, with a focus on dismissing people as ‘bigots,' the movement creates a clear sense that families are by default, unhealthy and unsupportive environments if you are L, G, B or T.
The movement favours quick rebellion and dismissive judgment over longer-term dialogue. The message from children to parents is clear - “Say you’re on board with every aspect of what I’m saying or else this will not end well." — This subverts the normal child-parent power dynamic and it is not a way to start an honest conversation.
We’re even seeing institutions deliberately blocking parents out of the conversation with schools for example, changing children’s names, changing their pronouns and in some parts of the world administering medication without the consent of or even informing the parents.
Social media (non-existent when I was young) is a big part of this, it suggests families are unnecessary with a new ‘glitter family’ just a click away! This is an illusion of course, a ‘glitter family’ is much less likely to stand by you in the long term than your family. It is all very sad and harmful for so many people and I do not believe that those of us who have these concerns based on our own lived experience and what we now observe should be made to feel that by voicing them, we are somehow the problem.
DIALOGUE IS WHAT WE NEED.
I have family members who told me (to my face) that they will tolerate my lifestyle choices, first off being straight is not a lifestyle choice 'this isn’t veganism.' Second of all don’t do me any favors by tolerating something, free yourself!
Combating discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity:
“some say that sexual orientation and gender identity are sensitive issues, i understand. like many of my generation, i did not grow up talking about these issues but i learned to speak out because lives are at stake.
I want to highlight the stigmatisation of mental health issues in general, I have depression and I take medication for it. It’s something I generally hide in real life due to stigma, especially from family relatives and friends.
(MENTAL HEALTH STIGMA)
"mental health is real, depression is real. anxiety is real, suicide is real."
Depression is real and it’s not a joke, seeking for a professional help is not funny. It’s the kindest thing you should give to yourself when you’re suffering with your mental health, please be kind and sensitive. This is not something you should joke around.
Always check up on the people you love, people we love must learn to communicate to us what they are dealing with. Nobody go to the doctor and not tell what is wrong with them, depression with suicidal thoughts it's not a joke and it's real. So, please stop joking about someone’s mental health.
A SPECIAL THANKS TO:
• Andi Bazaar (Writer)
• Mark J. Levstein (Co-Editor)
• Yevhn Gertz (Director Photography)
• dr Oliver Schofield, MD (Consulting)
• dr Seth Gryffen, MD (Consulting/Co-writer)
• dr Khaan, MD (Consulting)
• Timothée Freimann schofield (Photographed)
• Clayton Euridicé Schofield (Editor/Journalist)
• Scott Wynné Schofield (Publicist)
• Henrie Louis Friedrich (Analyst)
• Jwan Höffler Conwall (Art Interior Design)
• Hugo-licharré Freimann Schofield (Ass Director)
• Shot at GQ’s Studios by José Schenkkan and Benjamin Schenkkan Joseph
• In appearance by "Christopher Kofflér" (Model/Co-writer)
• In collaboration with "The Me You Can’t See UK" (TMYCSUK) / @tmycsuk
