Find Subsistence

Written by Andi Bazaar | July 28, 2023

13 min readJul 28, 2023

We’re all mental because we live in our heads, having good mental health is more than just the absence of a mental health issue. Everything we are and how we are we carry around in our craniums, more and more people know (of) someone who has committed suicide.

My story is my own, but the themes are universal. Life is a universal mental experience, it’s often batshit and as someone once said it’s “a bit like a maze in which you try to avoid the exit.

Everything has an opposite or a second half, perhaps this is one and the same. Love is impossible in a union in the greatest sense of this word, because if there is only one, there is nothing to love by nobody.

By the way, making a parallel with the Bible, for instance is very interesting. Before Adam and Eve were banished from Heaven, it says nothing about love as we know it because there is no division in Heaven. There is only harmony and this means that there is no love in the way we understand it, it is told about only after the Fall.

Cold has warmth, water has fire, night has day and plus has minus even what we consist of atoms is dual. It has both negative and positive particles, they say that a human being is the model of the Universe. It seems very probable to me. When we look at a table, we understand that it consists of atoms and they in turn, roughly speaking, consist of pluses and minuses.

"We do not argue with this and do not try to throw something away, we accept it as a whole, but when it is about humans, everything changes."

It is hard to see minus or negative traits in a close person like your Mother, brother or partner. We are used to attribute only positive traits to the persons important for us but is that honest to them? It appears that we rip out a half of their core, then a question should be asked: "do we love people or just our idea about what we would like to see them like?"

I think that union is possible only after we see our partner as a whole, when we stop closing our eyes, afraid to be disappointed. This may cause pain, but it may also bring energy which is needed for relationship development. Loving a phantom created by us is much easier, but this will sooner or later make disappointed and only seeing the beloved person as they are.

We may get a chance to build real relationship with them or not but it will be real. In you those are the new any case, components of the equation which means it will change and there will be a chance to solve it and when one part of the problem is absent there will be no success options. I will be very happy to hear your thoughts or experience.

"The person who hurt you may never offer an apology in the manner you desire, you can't control what others do — you can only control your response. If you insist someone to apologize to you in a certain way, the relationship may never be healed and you'll be left with a grudge."

So yes, never apologize when you are wrong or when you relaize you've hurt someone you love and or respect because every hateful person with no manners.

Never force yourself to apologize when you know that it will not be sincere. However, this does not mean forgetting your accountability. Work to be in a better place, so you can apologize to those you hurt whether intentional or not in a genuine manner.

I personally can’t entertain multiple people at the same time. I put my heart into every connection I form and I know it’ll hurt my feelings if I see the person I'm talking to do the same to others, (romantically ofc) I like you but I don’t wanna be treated as one of your options.

I used to get so angry and bitter and retaliate when people would hurt me, now I just wish everyone well and move forward with my life. I know my heart and I know who loves me unconditionally and that’s all that matters, today I learned something how to love and treat people sincerely.

"We’re all mental because we live in our heads, having good mental health is more than just the absence of a mental health issue. Everything we are and how we are we carry around in our craniums."

More and more people know (of) someone who has committed suicide.

When I was around 12-15 years old I'm feeling completely alone, out of place, too different to ever fit in or be accepted by anyone. I was at that crossroads sitting at that beach thinking that I should just head in, swim out and keep swimming forever. I loved the beach, the sea, I still do.

So it wouldn't that bad a place to spend the last and forever. More than once I fould myself there for hours, just staring in the distance trying to muster the courage.

I found myself a coward and went home every single time or was it hope? Perhaps then it felt like cowardice but looking back, I think it was hope because there were people who did care and whom I could have a laugh with depression is a bitch though.

It's really difficult to find ways to see potential and hope, as I said I didn't see it as something tangible back then but looking back I think it was a spark and I was very lucky to have that spark and so many others don't. That's not because they are lacking or weaker, it's not because they are at fault. It's just the hold of the depression being tighter more severe.

"Sometimes it doesn't matter how many people say they love you, they care about you, that they like you just as you are but just in case on this part three, I just want to try and light that spark in others every day. It's not your or their fault if it doesn't catch but in the moments that it does, it can make all the difference."

Be kind, reach out, make sure people can, know they can always come to you in their times of greatest need that there's no judgement.

tell them you like people.
tell people you think they’re funny, kind, smart, loving, caring and that you enjoy spending time with them.
tell and show people that they are an important part of your life and really.
tell them explicitly.
tell them you value them and appreciate them and their company

It might not make the difference, but it also might just and that's all we can do to fight depression together.

My story is my own, but the themes are universal. Life is a universal mental experience, it’s often batshit and as someone once said it’s “a bit like a maze in which you try to avoid the exit.”

I hope that in the DNA of the story I’ve woven, you too will come to the same conclusion: "shit happens, but it doesn’t have to define us we’re not broken."

I’m no Yoda, but there’s a thing or two I’ve realised along my way. Never ask someone what’s wrong with them, they’re not wrong or incorrect. Ask them what happened to them instead, the answer you get will likely be a truth first spoken.

Never ever joke about someone's mental health because some of these people are hanging by a thread, one joke and its done for them.

"Depression sucks, but I will overcome It."

As some of you probably know by now, I've been suffering from depression for a while now. While I haven't really made it clear outright, the past few years have clearly taken a toll on my mental health for several reasons.

It has affected my relationships, my work, my life in general really. I wanted to get into more detail about it to give more context while also giving you all the reassurance that, despite it I'll be ok. I'm not in such a state that I'm going to give up on life or stop doing what I love or whatnot, I'm not going anywhere. That being said, it hasn't been easy.

I'm pretty certain the breaking point of my mental stability was one of my family member death a couple years ago, that event messed me up more so than I care to admit. Ever since then, I've struggled to do much of anything. My motivation has taken a complete nosedive.

I've taken a rather nihilistic view of the world, I just want to lie in bed and do nothing most of the time nowadays which I can't do because life isn't gonna wait for me. One of my family membet death also took a serious toll on my family as a whole and I can't say that it hasn't caused us to drift apart quite extensively, I'm ashamed to admit it but it has become difficult for me to interact with my parents because of it.

My friends have also expressed concern for me and I admittedly hate that, I don't hate that they're worried. I hate that I'm making them worry. I know I can't stop them from worrying but the fact that I am making them worry makes me feel even worse, some friendships have also become irreparably damaged over the past few years for reasons related and unrelated that I won't get into.

FOUR WAYS TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR MENTAL HEALTH

1. Learn to say no!

Set Boundaries
Rest and recharge
Engage in activities that make you truly feel good

2. Take care of your body

Eat nutritious meal
Exercise
Drink plenty of water
Get enough sleep

3. Quiet your mind

Relaxation exercises and prayer can improve your state of mind
Enhance your outlook on life
Feel calm

4. Appeal to your senses

Listen to an uplifting song
Squeeze a stress ball
Go for a walk

HOW DO YOU TAKE CARE OF YOUR MENTAL HEALTH?

I fundamentally believe it’s important to slow down a few times each day and allow my body and mind to rest. Most importantly, setting an intention during the meditation helps me focus on a certain aspect of work and/or life.

When I finish a meditation session, I’m able to focus on what’s in front of me for the next three to six hours. Most importantly, I don’t hold on to things in the future and the past which helps me open up mental space for what’s in front of me.,

I know we are all feeling anxious, nervous, scared, sick and all sorts of uneasy feelings about tomorrow but please make sure you take a break from social media to rest your mind before tomorrow comes.

I just want to say, if you’re not as active on social media advocating for our rights, it’s okay. It’s okay to distract and ease your mind, it’s okay to have rest days as long as you have a stand you believe in our rights and you’re not apolitical. It's ok to take a break!

I've seen a lot of “stop being silent and fight for our rights!” and while it’s valid, please consider the fact that not everyone is mentally prepared to be strong all the time. Please rest if you need it, the world is full of negativity and it’s ok to take some time away from it.

You don't owe anyone social media presence, if the media is consuming you, poisoning your mind, giving you anxiety, take that break. Give yourself time even a one day break could give you some much needed rest, learn to prioritize your mind and heart.

Proverbs 4:23 — Above all else guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.

INTERESTING READ ON MENTAL HEALTH AND MINDFULNESS

create balance in your life
practice mindfulness
give yourself a break from social media to rest your mind
maintain healthy relationships

DAILY WELLNESS TIPS FOR YOUR MENTAL HEALTH

Take a Media Break Excessive media exposure to stressful events can negatively impact your mental health.
Take a break from the news, radio, and social media sites to give your mind time to rest.
Use trusted media sources to learn the information you need and then turn them off.

Just letting everyone know, if this is too much for you to handle or it's getting a little too overwhelming, a social media break is ok! having new information being pushed into your mind constantly can be so exhausting. Give your brain a rest and make sure you are staying safe.

Social media makes us believe we have to constantly be productive 24/7, I’m here to tell you to take a break and relax. Your mind, body and spirit deserves rest.

Btw your brain doesn’t need to be stimulated 24/7, give yourself a break from social media every now and then sit in a calm environment, listen to calming music, breathe, relax and try to be present. Let your mind rest.

Social media can be super taxing and it often goes unnoticed until you start stressing over little things, remember to take a break to rest your mind. It’s so important to take some time to let our minds rest and recharge sometimes.

Social media breaks are absolutely necessary for this reason, I cannot stress how important it is to get away from all of the noise and quietly reside within yourself. Mental isolation is needed to emotionally process, your subconscious mind needs rest too.

Taking breaks from social media is needed, you’re consuming so many things at once and sometimes the mind needs to rest. So many things are going on right now, it’s overwhelming and we are overloaded with information, news also violence. Remember to take a break off social media and breath, let your mind rest. These things happening are important and so is ur mental health.

It's important to give your mind a rest from studying, from news, from scrolling social media even (or especially) during finals week. Try sprinkling in 20-minute breaks, every few hours to do the exact opposite of your current task.

it’s okay if you need to take a break from social media.
it’s okay if it overwhelms you, it should.

We aren't meant to be in constant communication with everyone and take in everyone's opinions, etc. it's okay if you need to log off, slow down and just let your mind rest.

You are still in control of the information you consume, let your mind rest by taking a break from gadgets and social media. Find something worthwhile to do during this time, your mind and spirit will thank you for it.

If you haven’t taken a social media break this year yet, I strongly recommend doing so even if it’s just a couple days. Give your mind time to rest, this shit is a lot of stimulation and can be a lot on the mental.

For those who need to hear it, please be sure to take a break from the news and social media today. Give your heart and mind a little rest. Take a walk, read a book, do whatever you do to remember that peaceful moments can be wedged in there. It is necessary.

Now more than ever, it’s important to take some time and give yourself a break. Whether it’s a study or social media break, make sure to give your mind a rest! Take advantage of the fresh air and beautiful sunshine and catch a few rays today.

Getting enough rest is essential for taking care of your health and well-being, spend your time to relax your mind and body by taking a break from social media and gadgets. With enough rest, it can improve your mood the following day to make better decisions in work.

Okay, my anxiety has been really determined to not let my mind rest lately so I'm gonna take a break from social media until I can sort it out.

Sifting through social media can be exhausting, soul crushing and demoralizing. While it is important to stay updated and not get complacent, never feel guilty for taking much needed breaks from social media or also posting about your hobbies.

YOUR MIND DESERVES TIME TO REST

"I wanna disappear, I want to deactivate all my social media accounts and not hear anything from anyone. I want to have a peace of mind, I want to rest. I need a break, I'm tired. I just want to be done with everything, I want to disappear to find myself."

I believe it’s very unhealthy to spend a majority of your day consuming the thoughts and emotions of strangers on the internet especially when they contribute little to nothing to elevating your mindset, teaching you something new, or building you into a better person.

I’m probably going to take a break from most of social media tomorrow, I’ve had a rough couple of days and today I let my anger get the better of me and I regret it so much. I need to give myself a break and my mind a rest, I’ll be back

Guard your heart and mind today, take time to rest and recharge. Resting is an act of self love, most importantly be kind to yourself. If you feel overwhelmed by the news, turn it off. If social media becomes too much, take a break. Today is about you.

A SPECIAL THANKS TO:

Andi Bazaar (Writer)
Mark J. Levstein (Co-Editor)
Yevhn Gertz (Director Photography)
Dr Oliver Schofield, MD (Co-writer/Consulting)
Dr Seth Gryffen, MD (Consulting)
Timothée Freimann schofield (Photographed)
Clayton Euridicé Schofield (Editor/Journalist)
Scott Wynné Schofield (Publisher)
Henrie Louis Friedrich (Analyst)
Jwan Höffler Conwall (Art Interior Design)
Hugo-licharre Freimann (Ass Director)
Shot at GQ’s Studios by José Schenkkan and Benjamin Schenkkan Joseph
In appearance by "Andi Bazaar” (From the Creator of MHMTID Community)
MHMTID in collaboration with The Me: You Can’t See