Breaking Point: “Face The Demons”

Written by Andi Bazaar, co-wrote by Henrie Louis Friedrich, Gryffen Seth, José Schenkkan Joseph and Tydalé-Oliver Schofield | April 21, 2023

"I've spent years fighting my demons and depression, it’s something I still deal with today. I know it can feel impossible at times to see through the darkness to the other side, know that you are loved and if you ever feel like you’re not reach out, I got you!"

This is what Depression looks like, since last summer my life hasn't been the same.

I lost someone I loved and cared for, I had amazing job and I was surrounded by some of the best people you'll ever meet in your life.

I was put in a tough position and I raised my voice for the Injustice that went on as I reported that situation I got bullied for it, I got treated like shit and I had no choice to quit because no one stood up for what went on.

I haven’t been myself, I’ve let people down in my life and I find it very hard to have any good days where I can smile. Going to church and recording an episode of the 2 Mutts Podcast helps but only for a short time, for my entire life I felt if I help others that should fill my cup of tea up, it has but now it’s time for me to take care of myself and find a way to make those happy days comeback because I sure miss them.

“2022 wasn’t the best, 2023 has been a bit better but I’m still having some tough days.”

I hope God can be there for me, I hope God can show me the way out of this and I hope God can take all this pain away.

It's important to open up and talk, I need to do that more. Depression is real and mental health is real, if you are around someone who doesn't agree that's a shame, since May I have thought about taking my own life.

As male's we need to talk about mental health more. I hope one day I can have "More Good Days" — I'm doing this post to open the conversation or keep the conversation going for all of us.

This is what depression looks like, I hope with us opening up the conversation today and talking about mental health on this public platform it helps us all come together.

Mental Illness can make you miserable and can cause problems in your relationships, then the universe decided to make life harder with a cancer diagnosis when my depression and anxiety takes over.

Yes, I suffer from anxiety and depression. Yes, therapy, meds and mindfulness are instrumental parts of my life. "No, I’m not ashamed. No need to hide." — learning to love yourself can be difficult when you think you’re flawed, you are not.

Almost 7 years ago, I was bed ridden due to high anxiety and depression.

I still suffer from memory loss, panic attacks, sleeplessness and dark moments but I’m not where I was and for that I am grateful. One day at a time, friends.

I have two friends of suffer from depression and they told me that it got so bad that they considered suicide, they reached out to me and years later later they told me that just talking to me was enough to stop them from doing it. Talking helps!

I’m someone who suffers from anxiety and has suffered from postpartum depression/anxiety and has been lucky to find help, you are not alone! Please don’t be afraid to talk to someone or to seek help.

"Mental health is a huge issue and it’s a real thing in our world, I think it’s huge to talk, I think it’s huge to get help and it saves lives."

As many of you know I suffer from anxiety and depression, it’s tough to talk about on here sometimes because it gets used against me. However, the positive comments that I receive outweigh that. Mental health matters, I’m always here for you all.

I personally went through some pretty shitty anxiety and depression in 2020 and I know a lot of people were in the same boat. This year is off to a much better start, we’re all in it together.

Hugo's transparency about battling depression is a reminder that no one is alone.

Most days are a struggle to put on a good face and be happy but I’m working on it, I’m also always there to work on things with you if they’re not going well

It’s ok not to be ok!

Depression is a long-lasting low mood disorder, it affects around 1 in 6 people.

With the right management, it’s treatable but it is certainly not something you can just "snap out of"

Everyone can feel depressed, but that does not mean they live with depression.

If you live with depression, you feel persistently sad for weeks or months rather than just a few days.

There are lots of different reasons for a person to develop depression.

Symptoms of depression can look different for everyone, but here are some common ones.

There are some lifestyle changes you can make if you begin to feel low, these are management techniques for depression, rather than complete treatment.

There are different types of treatment for depression, not all treatments will work for every person. It’s about finding what works for you as an individual.

It’s important to seek support if you find yourself feeling depressed over a long period of time.

For more information about symptoms and management techniques of depression, you can turn to us

https://rethink.org/depression

1. DEPRESSION IS COMMON, BUT TREATMENT CAN HELP.

Depression is the most commonly experienced mental health challenge for young people aged between 12-25 years old.

2. DEPRESSION ISN’T THE SAME AS BEING "LAZY" OR "WEAK"

The way that others respond to a person with depression is important and the misconception that they are lazy or weak can make it more difficult for them to seek help and recover.

3. DEPRESSION HAS MANY CAUSES, AND CAN AFFECT ANYONE

IT CAN BE CAUSED BY: longstanding life issues: trauma, loneliness, addiction.

PHYSICAL CAUSES: genetic factors, medications, differences in your brain chemistry, nutrition, hormones, immune system and gut health.

4. DEPRESSION OFTEN EXISTS ALONGSIDE ANXIETY

Anxiety is experienced regularly by almost 50% of people who have depression, the problems experienced by people with anxiety like finding it hard to connect to others or engage in life without worrying, can lead to depression.

5. THERE ARE DIFFERENT TYPES OF DEPRESSION

• Major Depressive Disorder
• Chronic Depression or Persistent Depressive Disorder
• Seasonal Depression
• Bipolar Disorder

6. NO ONE CHOOSES TO HAVE DEPRESSION.

People don't choose to be depressed, in the same way that people don't choose to have cancer. So, telling a person with depression to cheer up or to "snap out of it" can be harmful and can leave them feeling more isolated.

7. GETTING HELP CAN BE REALLY HARD.

For many people, depression can bring feelings of shame or hopelessness and a sense of being broken or unworthy. This can make it a huge struggle to ask for support or to get help to make things better.

8. THERE ARE MANY OPTIONS FOR TREATING DEPRESSION.

Depending on the severity and cause of depression, different treatment methods are available which are evidence-based and provided by mental health professionals. However, recovery takes time and may involve lots of ups and downs.

EVER HEARD FO THE "SEROTONIN MYTH" AND DEPRESSION?

HERES A THREAD OF MIND-BENDING TRUTHS.

Depression is often believed to be caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain, particularly low serotonin but there is no evidence to support this theory.

The idea that depression is caused by low serotonin was initially proposed by academics but it was popularized by drug companies to market their antidepressants, particularly the SSRIs which became widely used and are still used today.

Anti-depressants can cause withdrawal symptoms that are similar to anxiety and depression, but it does not mean that people need to stay on the drugs. There is new research on tapering off antidepressants more carefully and slowly.

Antidepressant prescription rates have been increasing over the past 25 years and currently, at least 100 million worldwide are taking antidepressants. However, a third to a half of people taking antidepressants have no evidence

There are two main ways of thinking about what psychiatric drugs do: the disease-centered model, which sees drugs as targeting and reversing the underlying cause of the condition and the drug-centered model which sees drugs as suppressing symptoms.

DEPRESSION NEARLY COST ME MY LIFE

10 years later, I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. The 5 (not so simple) habits that saved me:

I remember feeling scared, seated in the doctor's office. I had just suffered a panic attack and was on the verge of another. I was genuinely afraid that I was losing my mind.

I filled out a questionnaire and the doctor told me I was suffering from severe depression, I wasn't surprised to be honest, he said I would have to start medication.

Fast-forward 10 years, I'm the best I've ever been mentally. Honestly, I'm getting tears in my eyes as I type this, it's painful to think back to that time but it makes me so fucking grateful that I'm better now.

DEPRESSION IS COMPLICATED.

There will never be a one-size-fits-all solution but today I wanted to share what helped me, in case it helps even one other person:

1. GRATITUDE

I always felt like I was never good enough, I still battle with this today but gratitude has helped more than I can describe. Every day I take a minute to think about:

• WHAT I HAVE
• WHERE I AM
• AND WHO I LOVE

It makes me feel lucky to be alive.

2. PURSUING YOUR PASSION

“Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose.” — it's a damn powerful feeling to wake up in the morning excited to work on something, if you haven't found that thing yet. Keep experimenting until you do.

3. SPENDING MEANINGFUL TIME WITH OTHERS

Isolation was always my first response to depression, I didn't want to put the shit I was dealing with onto my loved ones. This was a mistake, I've now built an amazing support network of people I can lean on in tough times.

4. MINDFULNESS

My mind is (was) an asshole, a negative voice picking me apart at every turn. Mindfulness was the key that unlocked a healthier relationship with myself, basically it allows me to create separation from my thoughts and escape negative thought cycles.

5. DELAYING GRATIFICATION

I used instant gratification as an escape, overwhelming my brain in order to distract myself from the fact that I hated my life.

• PORN
• FAST FOOD
• VIDEO GAMES

I'm not demonizing these things but the way I was using them prevented me from healing, I want to end this by saying that medication and therapy helped me but they were always a short-term solution.

Like trimming a weed instead of pulling it out at the root, also if you're feeling this way I know it's hard.

"it's really fucking hard, but please don't give up. there's always something you haven't tried yet."

A SPECIAL THANKS TO:

• Dr Tydalé-Oliver Schofield, MD (Consulting)
• Dr Seth Gryffenberg, MD (Consulting)
• Timothée Freimann schofield (Photographed)
• Clayton Euridicé Schofield (Editor/Journalist)
• Scott Wynné Schofield (Publisher)
• Henrie Louis Friedrich (Analyst)
• Jwan Höffler Conwall (Art Interior Design)
• Hugo-licharre Freimann (Ass Director)
• Shot at GQ’s Studios by José Schenkkan and Benjamin Schenkkan Joseph
• In appearance by "Hugo-licharre Freimann” (Model)